142 days into being a mom and I've loved, hated, adored and despised my son. I think it's the way it goes for everyone....I hope. I love him more than anything and would not trade him for the world. I can't imagine my life without him anymore. It's hard to think what my life would be like if I'd never gotten pregnant. He's nearly 5 months old and he's babbling cute stories to me, grabbing at his spoon, swatting at the dangling creatures on his gym, and supporting all of his weight on his feet. I'll never forget the nightmare of going to the hospital a month earlier than he was due with really high blood pressure and a lot of "We'll see"'s from the doctors. I had preeclampsia. After several hours of observation they induced labor. Our little boy had only weighed about 3lbs at the hospital a month before when they estimated his weight. We were both terrified that he'd need to stay in the hospital for months just to catch up. Labor resulted in Baby going into distress, so the doctor decided I needed a cesarian, so into surgery I went. It wasn't so bad. I don't remember the end of it. I started gagging on the oxygen about half way through, right after they pulled the baby out and cut the cord. I got to say hi to him before I passed out from the sedative the anesthesiologist gave me to keep me from gagging and causing problems. I woke up a few hours later in the recovery room, still gagging on the oxygen. It took me a few tries but I finally managed to get the nurse to remove the tubes from my nose and fell back to sleep for an hour or so. It was early the next morning (my birthday) that I finally got to hold my son for the first time. He weighed 5lbs 1.5 oz, and was 18 inches long. Not bad for a baby born 4 weeks, a month early to the day.

Since then we've had weeks of screaming, fussing, poopy, smelly, sweet, snuggly, chatty, loveable baby. Wouldn't trade him for the world!